Get it Together Colorado

The past few weeks have been so stinkin' stressful! I think a lot of it has to do with my lack of medication. I just decided one day to stop taking it because I don't like how I feel on it.  They make me tired and sort of out of it and I am sooo sick of it.  Unfortunately I don't think you're supposed to stop that crap cold turkey and of course, being the genius that I am, I did just that.  My anxiety is under control-ish but my OCD is way out of freaking control! Every little 'off' thing is literally driving me nuts. When we were writing lesson plans today, my template didn't line up perfectly and I finally had to walk away from it.  The problem? I seriously have not stopped thinking about how the boxes don't line up perfectly since 4:15 this afternoon.  Big sign that I have issues? Aw yeah.

Before I get into the big problem I have with the world, I just need to throw in there that last Friday was the best day of my life.  I saw Rascal Flatts and I got to sit next to the stage and it was awesome. I was also really proud of myself because some old guy (and by old I mean he was like 50, and before you jump down my throat....if you were 22 years old and were getting hit on by some dude as old as your dad you would be calling him an old man too!) told me he'd give my friend a guitar pick if he could take one of us home and I didn't even throw up or panic. I told him off instead :) It was nice to have the old Kayleigh peaking through!

Today I was checking Facebook while I was getting ready to leave work and I saw something that made me think "Colorado needs to get it together".

Apparently some university in Colorado had posted the top tips for preventing a rape.  I (through a LOT of searching) finally found the list in its entirety.  The following list (with the tips I deem the worst being highlighted) was:
1.Be realistic about your ability to protect yourself.

2.Your instinct may be to scream, go ahead! It may startle your attacker and give you an opportunity to run away.

3.Kick off your shoes if you have time and can’t run in them.

4.Don’t take time to look back; just get away.

5.If your life is in danger, passive resistance may be your best defense.

6.Tell your attacker that you have a disease or are menstruating.
7.Vomiting or urinating may also convince the attacker to leave you alone.

8.Yelling, hitting or biting may give you a chance to escape, do it!

9.Understand that some actions on your part might lead to more harm.


I find it hard to believe that number 6 would really work. I tried the whole "I have my period" thing and do you think that idiot cared? I am telling you from PERSONAL EXPERIENCE that saying you have a disease or your period won't typically deter a rape. And in response to number 7, I don't know that I could make myself vomit or pee on demand.  Especially if I'm scared! Who is going to stop while they're being raped and fighting for their lives and think, "Gee! Let me just throw up real quick!"

I think my biggest issue with this list is not that their tips are the dumbest things I have ever seen in my life.  I understand why they posted it on their webpage.  I am absolutely positively not against making women aware of what to do in dangerous situations.  I think, though, that they need to be taking different measures.  Offer self defense classes, educate your entire campus on rape and try to prevent victim blaming.

Their intentions were good, I'll give them that.  I just don't necessarily agree with how they've gone about it.

Another problem I have is that a lot of these things seem kind of obvious.  They're basically telling you to fight, and I think for a lot of girls who go through this, fighting is a survival instinct that just kicks in.  I don't know how similar my experience is to any other woman's, but I know for me I didn't think before I acted.  I don't even remember what prompted me to start biting, and kicking, and screaming.  I just went into survival mode.

Maybe this school should be giving resources too on where to find help.  I also think that if they are going to put a list like this one on their website, they should also be making a list that goes right next to it listing all of the ways they are trying to make their campus safe, and what THEY are doing to prevent assault and assist victims.  I would be more interested in that list!

A lot of you won't agree with me, and that's fine.  Everyone I've talked to about this have been pretty split opinion wise.  Maybe I'm reading too much into it.  I just know that if UNCG had ever sent out anything like this I would have been marching my booty straight to the Dean of Students Office. I had to have a talk with my own school after my stint in the nut house. Instead of supporting me and seeing what they could do to help me, they forced me to seek therapy (if I did not they would take disciplinary action).  I was the one treated like the bad guy by my own university and I was not ok with that.  I mentioned that to one campus office, and made suggestions about what they could do to assist victims instead.  Honestly, if I went to this school in Colorado we would be having the same conversation.

What's your take on it? Agree with me? Disagree with me? Not sure what to think?


P.S. I have also made the decision today to apply to become a public speaker for RAINN :)